It’s a miracle: I can walk

It’s a miracle. I can walk this morning. And I actually mean that. I am grateful I can walk. Of course I am being a bit tongue and cheek but the fact is I could not last night. And it is all my fault…no wait….it is my friend’s fault. She got me into this. This all started out so innocently.
Around here, if you do not do something to make the winter go by, it drags on forever. Last year, she talked me into taking music lessons on the recorder. I did not need much persuasion. It was something I wanted to do for a while. I hung in there and learned to play the soprano recorder. I am back again this year learning the alto which is so much more melodic. I am in love with this instrument and will continue to play it. The soprano is much more shrill and the best part was it drove my cat nuts when I practiced. She doesn’t seem to mind the alto. Well so far she hasn’t shredded the music like she did with the soprano.
So this summer, my friend and I decided to look into something new. We talked about yoga and I was not too thrilled with it because of a past experience I had with it last year. We went and watched a display of an activity we thought would be fun and it looked so easy. Sign me up! Tai Chi. Who knew? If 90 year old men can do this, how hard can it be?
Ok…it is not easy. It is a beautiful method of ripping every muscle in your legs out of your body and replacing the muscles in your stomach with a sack of rocks. NO just kidding. It is beautiful and it is extremely difficult to get it right. I am enjoying it very much. The issue is she has us learning a pose and then she holds us while she talks or demonstrates the next thing. So you are slightly bent or mid-extension and she is chatting away. And you get yelled at if you move ahead. And she does it so slow when we practice. I think once you learn the poses and do them sequentially it is less straining. But last night, she went very slow over and over.
And I had to leave before the class ended to take Bishop to the vet. The class is on the second floor of an old firehouse. A very tall staircase leads up to the room and unfortunately down too. I had a bit of a charlie horse in the class and as I was changing my shoes it went off again. Going down the stairs was a joke. Trying to cross the very busy street was like running gauntlet. I hobbled to my car and spent the rest of the night being very aware of how sore I was. But it was an ok sore.
So this morning, the pain is gone. I was not as stiff as I expected actually. This is going to be a good thing as I can sense the muscles around the knees. It will be good to strengthen them to support me.
I am not sure what is in the air right now. I spent a few moments last night reading some different blogs and our circle. There seems to be a reoccurring theme right now of upset and people struggling. I noticed it at work with a few people I talked with. It is like a mild wave of irritation and angst. Fellow writers seem to be sharing a common upset that is manifesting. I purposefully do not watch or read the news. I figure if there is something that important going on, I will find out. I do not need the interpretation of some overzealous reporter putting sensationalism on top of a tragedy. I do believe we are all connected and sense the feeling of troubled waters. Some say I am oversensitive. I have gotten over that being an insult and take it as a compliment. You betcha, I am sensitive.
Even though I was worn out last night, I did not sleep well. Physically I did and my body replenished. But I had some douzzies dreams. One was about an interesting place in a woods. To get to it, you had to drive down this stream (it’s a dream) and there were huge boulders you had to drive over. In the dream I did this two times and I can still see the boulders in my head. At the end of the stream there was a recreational area where people were playing in the water. The stream cascades down a hill to a falls and people were jumping off the rocks into the falls. At the bottom of the falls was a huge lake and people were on the beach. I could only see a small part of the lake, but I knew it well from other dreams. In this dream, Bishop was there and we were cuddling as we watched people. He hates water, so he was not going near it. I got up to go into the water and kept facing some small issues which prohibited me. I do not remember them and I woke up and never got to the water. I was frustrated. I know the symbolism of the water.
I had another dream which woke me right up around 3am and I had to get up to shake it off. It ended in pure fear. I have had this dream in different versions. Same theme with different scenery. I have a fear of dark rooms, dark staircases going into dark rooms, dark halls and so on. A reoccurring dream I have is walking into a dark room and not being able to find a light to turn on. You get the drift. Last night a nasty entity was in this completely dark room and I was placed in it. There was a being in the door who was about to shut me in. I was pleading with the being who was a thin faceless statue like being almost like an alien. There was not a sense of them being an angel although they might represent it. I was pleading with them to not shut me in as the fear in my chest grew. I knew that behind me was pure evil and it would “get” me. I have dreamt that sensation many times before. Often there is an unknown evil that I am trying to get away from that is in the dark. I have not had this dream in a long while. I know the symbolism is huge and as I typed this I saw that it is mirroring what I am going through in my conscious life. In my dream, I lay my hand on the chest of the being to demonstrate that….. and I woke up. The fear was with me for a few moments. I also am still conscious of the fear this morning. The laying of my hand on the being’s chest was representing the feeling I get in my hands when I do healing touch. I know I am still unsure about my ability with all that.
So I am not sure what is going on. I have written about being in transit. I am being aware of the messages. Last night is about facing some fear which is pretty buried. So with a slightly sore body, I must now go face my day. I hope everyone has a blessed day filled with miracles as profound as being able to walk. When you think of it, it pretty amazing we can do that at all.


2 thoughts on “It’s a miracle: I can walk

  1. I’ve never done Yoga, partly, I suspect, because I do not want to have my muscles ripped to pieces either, but I did do something like it, and the memory of the discomfort lives with me still. Now I rely on decent walks, and a bit of crazy dancing to keep me nimble

  2. So glad you are mobile again.That must feel great! About your dream…if it is true, as some who study dreams say, that all the people in our dreams are an aspect of us…then perhaps the entity representing fear is what is buried in you…and the addage “nothing to fear but fear itself” comes into play. That you laid your hand on its chest could mean you are ready to heal that fear. Healer heal thyself sort of thing. Very positive. Just a suggestion. Blessings!

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